I’ve recently decided that I will not be happy in any other relationship than a D/s relationship. The knowledge that I am a submissive is not news to me. I’ve known for years, but I’ve always thought it was something I could just ignore.
Its not. I have no interest and even less respect for men that cannot or will not dominate me. Now, while I may not be looking for a relationship at the moment I at least want to meet like minded individuals. People open to and/or involved in the D/s lifestyle. To aide in my quest I joined alt.com. To be honest it only depressed me. Witness the members of the lifestyle in my area:
“Seeking thick juicy BBW Breeder Sows”
“My private fertility Clinic”
Really? When I am ready for a relationship this is what I have to look towards in my area? Peachy.
Surely there must be others…
And yes, there are. But I’m not satisfied with someone who needs to concern themselves with putting extra letters on words denoting T/their position. I don’t have time for that childish bullshit, not to mention I am a woman – I know who I am, I don’t need someone who doesn’t have the confidence to trust me to know that I serve. And on the topic of serving I do not care to know a submissive who indiscriminately serves or a Master who indiscriminately dominates.
I want something more…
norchron (Dec 30, 2009)
It can be tempting to look for something outside of us for the solution to our happiness. After all, we’ve been told our entire lives that happiness is achieved by getting what we want. But what we want can be had internally as well. I like to be dominant, and such relationships are very rewarding to me, but I also try not to need domination in order to be happy. When we start off with a deficient base, it can detract from whatever we place upon it, but if we begin with an abundant base, then what we place on top of it is magnified. When we do not need something, but prefer it, it becomes even more edifying to our happiness because there is no deficit attached to it, and we experience one abundance upon another rather than abundance built to satisfy need. It helps me to be able to step back and achieve perspective so that I am free to explore my dominance in new ways. When we hold to tightly to something it can become a burden to exploring.
It is good that you have discovered so much about your sexuality, it must have taken great courage to move in a direction that others disapproved of, or would not have understood. It was your free nature that allowed you to move in new directions to achieve greater happiness, and that same nature can serve you well. I hope you find many good things along your new path.
Fea (Dec 30, 2009)
I’ve known about this part of me for 8 years now… it is only now that I realize I’ll not be truly happy in a relationship without recognizing it.
I’ve tried to brush it aside and enjoy a vanilla relationship – but I just don’t…